Changing the Mindset That Says “I’m On My Own”

We’re nearly 75% of the way through our time with these students, and as always, there are weekly ups and downs. As our conversations have shifted toward community and belonging, we continue to be reminded of the real challenges students face—in school, culturally, and at home.

One of the greatest challenges we encounter is a deeply rooted mindset around conflict. We are constantly amazed by how our students self-advocate and stand up for themselves. Their courage is undeniable. And yet, we also recognize that how this often plays out can create more harm—for themselves and for others.

Underneath many of these moments is a subtle but powerful belief:
“Nobody is going to help me. I’m on my own. I have to figure this out myself.”

That mindset doesn’t shift after one conversation. It doesn’t disappear because of one good day in mentor circle.

Real change happens under the consistent pressure of positive influence.
One conversation doesn’t change everything.
But one conversation, one day, every week, over the course of years? That begins to shift culture.

After three years of showing up on campus, we’re starting to see it. Students we’ve built relationships with walk up to us in the cafeteria, excited to share that they’re joining the basketball team, staying out of trouble, or thinking differently about their future.

Those moments may seem small—but they are evidence of something bigger. A mindset slowly shifting. A belief being rewritten. A student realizing they are not alone after all.

And that’s why we keep showing up.

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